Wednesday, December 8, 2010
When I heard the news last night that she had passed I was in total shock. The news the night before made it seem like she had a little while left and I thought she might make it past the first of the year. This did not come to pass.
I feel so badly for her children. I have been where they are. My mother passed from complications due to breast cancer. The only difference between them, and me and my siblings, is that I think she probably tried to prepare them the best she could that the end was coming and what to expect and they all were able to say their goodbyes. I did not have that luxury, we were blindsided by my mother's death. It doesn't make how I feel toward them any differently. It's the same feeling to lose your mother at a young age whether you knew it was coming or not. It's a feeling of loss and not understanding the why of it. They know the why of it but I'm betting they don't truly understand the why.
I'm going to say something that some might not agree with, but this event in my life left a lasting impression on me and made me do a 180 in my belief in God. How can a God take a mother from her children?? Believe me, through the years I have talked to many friends about this, and I've heard it all about the why. My thing is this - Jesus loved the little children - and then my mother went away leaving 5 children from the age of 7 to 15 that needed her. I went to Sunday school and church when I was younger. Until this happened. To this day I truly don't know what I believe but that one event changed me for the rest of my life. Of course....how could it not?
Now their life is changed. I can't tell you how much I feel for them. Please remember them in your prayers.